Gonzo SEO

I hate aspiring writers who bang on about HST as if invoking the name of Mr Thompson will somehow make them writerly Gods.

Take your heroes, burn them. Then spread the ashes on your toast as you wait for you latest bittorrent of Manga to download.

However, for those who know what gonzo journalism is – and if you don’t know, you need to read more – need to look at that writerly style and apply it to their blogging style. The reason being is that the words of a gonzo tracht do not fit comfortably into the nicely shaped holes that await information. The words and thoughts and ideas and feelings tend to scrape the sides and ruin the pristine condition that the grammar nazis like to keep their information brain holes in.

When you scrape the edges of someones mind you make them sit up and think, question, change emotion. When that happens the reader has been softened, sweetened, seduced for any kind of message you want to.

This is not new, it’s ancient. And don’t think that moist inducing companies like Apple and Google do not employ such tactics constantly. They are steeped in the dark arts of black ops marketing technique and will shaft you deep into the softer parts of your mind to get their message in.

Have I broken my own rule by invoking the “HST” bomb and then saying not to.

Of course I have.

The first rule of gonzo blogging is there are no rules.

Greek Coffee Fused with SEO Twitter Streams

An SEO should always travel. Even if just to load up the Google front page and view how the foreigners search for stuff. As I sit with salt baked onto my skin whilst I sip the surprisingly good, sludgy, Greek coffee, I think about the bubbles we exist in.

How different people, who speak different languages, have different alphabets and different ways of eating, defecating, picking their nose and bribing the local official.

It’s all different.

Those who can understand the differences, both subtle and major win.

Those who don’t, stay in their bubble being big fish in an eggcup full of water.

You see that a lot in the Asperger-flicted seo space. Guys (and it invariably is guys) who like to learn a lot of over complicated, ultimately useless information who like to bamboozle noobs and spread confusion of the Twitter feeds like a drunken spider on it’s way to the taverna.

And of course those who treat “the game” like a business, rather than a private/public wank are those who tend to to step out of the bubble and discover pastures green, with trees weighed down with over ripened fruit just waiting to be plucked.

Twitter aids in our process of being able to identify those who are simply gobbing off and are full of fecal matter.

I’m as guilty of turning my twitter stream into a lumpy/liquid stream of shit as is the next man. But I do like to think I throw the odd gem in every know and again.

My favourite usage of Twitter is that of a bullshit detection tool.

Those who tweet all day may not be doing it because they are crapola at “the game”, but because the stream of digital communication provides a warm electronic blanket they can wrap around themselves to fill the gaps in their souls.

Those who leave week long gaps in their stream are not doing it because they overdosed on plain chocolate McVities Digestives and Vimto and have nothing to say. But because they are getting on with business, building their empire.

An Empire not built on the sand of Facebook, as I talked about recently, but on a solid foundation of a list of prospective punters – on blogs and websites which they own. Not owned by some twatty American corporation that has delusions that it more important than a tub of Chunky Monkey.

Own it, don’t rent it.

General Baron Kurt von Hammerstein-Equord said

General Baron Kurt von Hammerstein-Equord said

“I divide officers into four classes — the clever, the lazy, the stupid and the industrious. Each officer possesses at least two of these qualities. Those who are clever and industrious are fitted for the high staff appointments. Use can be made of those who are stupid and lazy. The man who is clever and lazy is fit for the very highest commands. He has the temperament and the requisite nerves to deal with all situations. But whoever is stupid and industrious must be removed immediately.”

If you are lazy you look for the short cut, you break the rules and you work damn hard to get that short cut.

When found, you then relax.

Thus is the nature of those who use Search Engines to their advantage.

What Dan Raine Taught me about SEO Agencies

I was watching a Dan Raine presentation in the wee small hours of the morning. And I realised what seo agencies are about.

Or rather what they are not about.

It’s something that has been niggling me for a while and I probably haven’t raised it because a lot of my clients are seo agencies.

SEO agencies don’t do cutting edge.

I think I’ve been to all the seo conferences in the UK and you hardly ever get a presentation that is cutting edge from an agency.

Which is fine.

They are about delivering what is mainstream, stuff like buing links from newspaper websites and the like.

They are also about managing the client, which obviously is an important part of the equation.

But the client will get in the way of implementing cutting edge techniques as most are new and highly experimental and there are little or no case studies around.

Also, most clients have not the time nor the industry knowledge to be taught about these cutting edge techniques, let alone being sold them and so the seo agency falls back on the tried and tested.

And there is nothing wrong with the tried and tested.

This is not a criticism of seo agencies, it’s merely a realisation of their place in the Internet Marketing food chain.

A lot of businesses need the tried and tested and have deep pockets to pay for it.

But people like Dan Raine are a couple of jumps ahead on the evolutionary scale of Internet Marketing.

If you are in the industry, when he speaks, you should listen.

But you probably wont.

You don’t have time.

What you do right now works for you.

You have to tweet about your new iPhone 4 (and how best to hold it)

But I will be listening and applying a few of his cutting edge techniques.

They certainly work for linkbaiting.

Why Am I Bad at SEO?

I have to confess, I am really bad at optimising my web pages. And the reason is this,

“It’s not knowledge that holds most people back in SEO, it’s Implementation”.

… which was something I tweeted a couple of hours ago whilst reading an seo forum. I have to say, link builder, Debra Mastaler and Aaron Wall really get the grey matter working.

The reason I say I am bad is that the optimisation of my pages do not match the knowledge I have in my head. Although the knowledge is of value, it’s only realised when implemented.

The reason it’s not implemented is because I can generally get away with it as I focus primarily on building exceptional content and getting links to it than optimising web pages. It works so well that the optimisation part simply gets pushed aside.

Not to say that I don’t have the urge once in a while. In the past few weeks I have looked at clients seo structure and relised a tweak here and a tweak there and their traffic will triple. But I kept quiet because creating content about 10 Kittens on Crack go on Holiday to Amsterdam is far more interesting that trawling keyword analysis and building hub pages with a little bit of linkable content and then arguing with the IT dept of said client.

You know how it is.

Something has to give, you can’t do everything.

So the answer to the question, why am I bad at SEO? It’s because I am good at something else.

Why is this important to you?
It’s very important to know what you are good at, what you are passionate about and not get sidetracked into being something you are not.

If it’s working for you, ignore the critics and just keep on with it.