Does weird search term traffic Convert?

I am sure you have looked through your own server logs and spotted the odd, weird search term. I seem to get a lot due to my analagous writing style. I like to use a colourful metaphor or two to illustrate the point.

Here are a few recent, weird search terms that Google sends traffic for:

The weird search terms in my server logs
video prank upskirt (this is what you get when you write about seomoz)
old major geezer ( This was from a Digg post about Matt Drudge getting less traffic than Digg)
hack dales site (who the hell is this?)
5 reasons why wolves howl (that’s what you get when you write about Graywolf aka Michael Gray)
what does akon do to persuade people ( I use the Akon WordPress Template as a base and I wrote about persuading people so….)
satanic messages (Is SEO satanic?)
social whore (Is this guy really a social whore?)
woman secrets (if it’s a secret, then I don’t know what it is, anyone care to enlighten me?)
pictures of graywolfs (you would think they would use a picture search and not click on an seo blog)
girlfriend headlines ( I really don’t get what these people were searching for exactly)
where can i buy food for sea monkies in the uk (er, I tend to use the term monkey as an insult, but I am not sure on thise, hey, there’s a niche blog in there somewhere, perhaps)
flu in cornwall (Is Cornwall a hotbed for the virus?)
tesco security switched off (probably a shoplifter trying to search for ways to steal from Tesco)
sexy woman teach (well they have taught me a lot in my time)
when did elvis got married ( I have no idea)
cornwall (hey, that’s where I live)

It’s funny, looking through the logs I see words and phrases used in a way I could never think of. I guess it’s an example of the long tail (good book, you should read it) although why people still click through when it’s obviously not what they are looking for beats me.
I think it’s time to play a game where I think of odd words and try to get them in the logs for that month.

The serious search terms

I also get traffic for:

neutralize smart-traffic ( local seo companies, Neutralize are one of the best UK seo firms)
how to game digg (surely no one would think of such an evil thing)
richard quick (Cornish web designer Good friend of mine who literally wrote the book on web design)
uk seo (cool)
linkbaiting (even cooler)
uk seo company (sub-zero)
is seoblackhat good (duh)
david naylor dvd (does he have one, and just what kind of dvd is it?)
smart-traffic seo agnes (another local seo company)
linkbaiting service ( I already have some clients for my own linkbaiting service, more later)
“darren rowse” (Shaman of the professional blogger, top bloke)
is blackhat illegal (depends on your definition, but mostly not, Google makes a lot of money from black hat spammer adsense sites )
headline writing samples ( a couple of posts on headlines and in comes the traffic, I would like to expand on this and detail my own headline creation philosophy. Although it doesn’t work 100%)
seo social networking (as an seo blogger consultant type, networking is crucial)
how social network effect in seo (something that I will continue to look at)
stumbleupon (my favourite social media site, mostly because it’s hard to spam, it can be done, it’s just difficult)
“conversion rate experts” (cool online marketers, I keep meaning to interview these social media consultants)
shoemoney page views alexa ranking (gotta love the Shoe)

Obviously I am not going to give you the number of times a term was searched for, some were only once. I like that a lot of the serious search terms coming up are the terms I am targeting. This is only a sample and there were terms that were nasty I decided to self censor.

I would be interested in the odd terms that come up for other seo blogs, it’s a bit of fun and it’s good to see how real people mangle the English language to find their desire. I realise you might find some of it embarrasing and you may not want to republish it thinking that Google will think your site is something other than a fantastic seo blog (gotta stop keyword stuffing), but c’mon, it’s just a bit of fun.

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